This silent dancing noose that begs me to swing and I want to; whether wrong or right. And who are you to say if I do? Life is everything in between. Decisions, decisions… My shattered heart lay paused and the choices… no good. Nail yourself to my pain and bleed for me the tears that have gone dry. If love should could come in shadowed, cloudy phases, full of any infidelity, morality, lust, euphoria, despair or all the other jagged pills to swallow; I wish that it not come at all. I am one whole puzzle seeking another whole. To many have lost their pieces. While brief orgasms of the heart were once a love left in the past though it ended before the words were ever said. Now ringing through my head as if it mattered. I’ve become blank, numb and most of life happens when you are not really there; just as I want my love more and more to be shared. But no one sees me as I am. They only see pieces that they could use to fill in their own blank spaces created by their own lies and sadness. So now, here I stand with this dancing noose around my neck. Decisions, decisions… Making me more aware of all memories I just want to forget.
Photography by Peter Coulson